Fast-forward almost 9 months later. Here we are in late August. Amy and I have talked everyday since her visit last in November. A lot of times she will wake me up with a good morning text and be the last person I talk to before going to sleep. In between all of this, we text each other every few hours having short little convos. It’s a nice feeling. I remember in March telling her about my feelings and she had just wanted to stay friends. Then two months later, she tells me that I am the only guy for her. I was driving at the time and actually had to pull over because I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. After she told me this, it was almost like she tried to protect herself because all I could get out of her was “idk” and “idk what I want or what I’m doing”. Having helped her get over her last relationship, I told her that I wasn’t going to pressure her. That I know she had been hurt a lot in the past and to remember that she can always talk to me. (I’m sorry for the novel. I just wanted to give you a good idea of what our friendship was like.)
We’ve said a lot of cute things to each other. Things that ordinary friends wouldn’t say to each other. About a month ago, she was called in to jury duty and had to attend from like 7am-10pm Monday thru Thursday, and toward the end of the week, she got sick. I did a little Google searching, found the closest (and nicest) florist, and had flowers delivered to her with the card reading, “Just wanted to brighten your day. Hope you feel better.” And it was of course signed by me. She loved them and started giving me more attention. Plenty of texts throughout the day that just had a smiley face in them. I was really, really happy that this was going somewhere, and I felt like I had finally gotten myself out of the friend zone if I was ever in it. I consider this girl one of my best friends and even though we’re 4 hours apart, I feel incredibly close to her. Now, I don’t know if this is with all girls, but she’s a little hard to read sometimes. The extra attention she has been giving me stopped the last week and a half. Probably because of her new job. She was out for her friends 21st birthday the other day and I woke up to a text from her at like 3:30 AM. It might be a little weird to you guys, but she does this once in a while. It makes me feel good because I know that she is thinking about me. So anyway.. the text read, “Getting pizza… I miss you.” Haha. She was probably drunk.
So she is coming to visit me on Friday. I’m picking her up at the train station and we’re going to hang out the rest of the day, all of Saturday, and a little of Sunday. I’m sure we’ll sleep in the same bed together. We’ve made little comments before such as, “wish you were here layin’ next to me.” So I think it’s a safe bet to assume that we’ll be sleeping together. As far as sex goes, I don’t think it will happen. I’m not upset about it really. If it happens, it happens. I’ll be prepared. But I just care about being close to her and spending time together. If you’ve read this far, I’m sure you can tell that I really care a lot about this girl. I hope to make her my girlfriend this weekend. Here’s my question:
Do I have a “relationship talk” with her? When do I do this? When we’re cuddling at night watching TV? I know that she’ll bring up the distance issue.. we’re only 4 hours apart. If it does get brought up, I’m going to say that I’ll visit her as much as I can. 2 weekends a month. Thatll be hard to do considering I go to college full time and I’m going into my senior year next Monday. Basically, what I want to know is, do I talk to her about a relationship? If so, what’s a good way to ask her without sounding high school-ish (i.e. “Will you go out with me?”) When should I tell her (when I’m driving her back to the train station on Sunday? In bed cuddling?)
I want to say a HUGE ‘thank you’ to anyone who took the time to read this. This weekend is going to be the most important weekend of my life and has been almost 10 months in the making for me. Haha. Thanks again.Ladies, could I please get your advice (concerning a girl spending the weekend with me)?
Holy crap! Having just finished reading War and Peace II, and still awake, here's some advice. You say you don't want to sound high-schoolish, so stop acting like a kid and step up. You don't need a formal talk with her, just open your mouth and start the first time you are alone with her. Just say that you like her and would like to start dating her seriously. Ask her if she is on board with that. If she says yes, then you can work out all the details later. Just do it and stop worrying about it. If she's as nice and sweet as you say she is, she'll probably be glad you finally opened the subject.Ladies, could I please get your advice (concerning a girl spending the weekend with me)?
You can ask her what do you think about me ?
Do you think we can be bf or gf ?
Ask yourself what do you want in relationship then ask her if she has the same goal. You will feel if there is any chemistry between you two while cuddling or kissing. As far as sex, if you don't think it's the time yet, you can wait.
Yes! You MUST have the ';relationship talk'; with her.
What's the point of being in a relationship if you're not relating?!
You should start minimizing the texting and do more phone conversations since you live far away from each other. Texting is the worst way to communicate something like this.
Communications is:
7% written
38% Verbal ( tone, inflection of voice, intonation )
55% Non verbal ( body language )
By texting you're missing a whopping 93% of the data!!!!
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omg you are the cutest :$
m preety sure she likes you too...but she has stuff going on in her life..and when she is free from all the hectic stuuf that she has been doing ..she thinks about you..its like end of the day..you are the one she wants to talk to ..
long distance relationships can be hard sometimes ..dont pressure her into anything..just try figuring out how she feels about you..
oh..nd dont forget to welcome her wiith flowers..oor ccook her dinner and be the sweetest :D..not that you are not already
and GOOD LUCK ! :)
Okay, so I'm going to be totally honest with you. The longer you avoid ';having the conversation';, the longer you are going to feel dissatisfied with the situation. In other words, if my guess is correct, you've had some pretty rough times wondering where you stand with this girl. Why does she only text, but not call or visit more often? Why is she coming to visit, but not being totally open with you? Maybe she feels confused about or burned by prior relationships. Maybe she really does view you as a valuable friend and is afraid that being in a relationship will ruin it. It happens.
But for you, you have to know. You'll know when the right moment is. The important thing to remember is to be confident and be sure of yourself. Let her know how much she means to you, but that you can't stand the ambiguity. Everyone deserves to be with someone who is crazy about them. I know. I've been married to my guy for eight years and every day I marvel at the fact that he is my husband and I get to be his wife.
Good luck, though, I know it'll be tough. But you can do it.
Wow. You just made my day, now that I know that guys think about this too. I'm at a similar point... wondering if I should ask the same question even though there's some distance between the two of us.
Bring it up, but don't do it on the way to the station. I'd say do it either post-nookie (or w/e you're doing in bed) or when you're out during the day. Just make sure it comes up in a natural flow of conversation and doesn't seem to stiff/planned out.
Good luck!
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